Soft Hands
by SaintHeartwing
Summary: Dr. W.D Gaster wasn't sure why he told 1-S and 2-P what he did. But he found himself recalling the one time he met a human. The one time his interaction with the species wasn't tainted by blood, war, anxiety or fear. A moment in time he still, to this day, doesn't understand. And wishes that he did. Inspired by Zarla-S's "Handplates" series, I present...a tender moment in time.


W.D Gaster regretted telling 1-S and 2-P what he had.

1-S had talked about learning how to dodge to his brother, the tubby skeleton speaking quietly and softly to his brother in the cell about how humans fought, and about how their creator had said humans did what they did to monsters for one simple reason...they were stronger, and killing monsters benefited them. It was just kill or be killed. And Subject 2-P had remembered the doctor speaking about the war between monsters and humans.

And so a question had popped out of 2-P's mouth. And it had been a question Gaster remembered asking his own parents, back when he had been Subject 2's age, looking so, SO much like P did now...

"Had humans always been like that?"

"No, not always." Gaster found himself answering automatically. He'd flinched at this, cringing a bit, realizing he had just opened the door to the curious twosome to ask even more questions, 1-S's voice rising out from the cell the two were within. Gaster had to look away from the snazzy metal clipboard he'd been writing on to look at the two as 1-S's short framed-form rose up from off the plain blanket he'd been lying down on.

"Oh really?" 1-S inquired. "So they didn't always want to kill monsters? Does that mean they liked you at some point?"

"Not exa-" Dr. Gaster now looked flustered. He looked away slightly, and 1-S knew, he KNEW that look on the doctor's cracked face. The way the lines that ran up from his left and right eye would somehow shake, the faint crease on his features always gave away the fact he had been close to saying something juicy, and his natures were fighting it out. There was the inner scientist in Gaster who so badly WANTED to talk about the strange, almost unknowable creature that was "Man", that wanted Subject 1 and 2 to know about everything they were capable of so they could be prepared, be ready...to kill, or be killed, if the need arose. Then there was their captor, who didn't want them to know too much, to know enough to hurt him, to use against him, to...feel.

Some part of 1-S knew that, at one point, Gaster **had** cared about them.

Perhaps he'd even loved them.

But he had known that if he kept caring, kept loving, he couldn't hurt them. And for "everyone else's sake"...to "do what he had to, what people need me to do"...he had to distance himself. Some part of 1-S knew that.

And _despised_ Gaster for it.

Did Gaster not want to tell them because talking about the time before all this, before monsters and humans had fought, was a time that belonged to a different Gaster? A softer, kinder one? That if he talked too much about them, admitted to him, he might start to feel again? To care again? Subject S knew Gaster had lost friends and family, that much he'd picked up on from their talks about the war, as did P. Was Gaster just determined to talk about that life as little as possible so he wouldn't have to remind himself of what it meant to feel for others?

Or maybe he just didn't want to talk because...yes, maybe that was it.

Gaster was a coward. 1-S knew this. Gaster had almost screamed at Subject 2 when 2-P had tried to say that maybe it wasn't Gaster's fault his kind had died off so horribly the way they had in the war. That Gaster, being so young, couldn't have done anything to fight the humans off, that if was on THEM for fighting and killing to begin with, and Gaster couldn't cope with that, having blamed himself for so long.

Perhaps he just didn't want to feel like a coward again.

"...I don't think you could understand." Gaster muttered out.

"Well...try us!" 2-P insisted. "Did the humans ever live together with monsters?"

Gaster actually chuckled dryly at this. "Live together"? A bit of a stretch." He sighed, and for a moment, his tone became wistful. Softer.

"In the old days, the large towns and cities of our realms had dividing lines of territory. On those lines, there were other towns and cities, mutually shared by monsters. Nobody was really "living together". Though they may have passed each other on the street, or bought from the same market or shops, visited the same smiths and book stores and stood under the same rain and the same clouds...no. They didn't live together. Not in public at any rate. Such an idea would be...unthinkable. After all, monsters were...well...monsters." Gaster chuckled again, shaking his head.

"Creepy or terrifying or strange. What people do not know, they often fear. Then again, there is also some who have an attraction to the unknown, and sometimes they saw...creatures they could warm up to in us."

"Like what?" 1-S wanted to know. Now he was intrigued. Gaster's scientist side had won over. The need to explain, to talk about all he knew, to share his knowledge had won over the fear of dredging up old wounds and the worry of "am I telling them too much". He was an eager teacher who'd just needed a little push.

"Well, the Temmie race, of course. They were furry, adorable, and they had a very...charmingly quaint way of speaking." Gaster sighed, adjusting the glasses he wore atop his bony, skeletal head. "You might have seen a picture of them on that "Tem Flakes" box you got when you got into my office." He added.

"Ohhh, THOSE things!" P's eyes were going all starry, a beaming expression on his face. "They are so, so cuuute! The little tails, and the floppy ears and the tiny little noses!"

"Yes, humans found them similar to "cats". I suppose humans have more...**mercy** in them for creatures that are cute and cuddly and similar to creatures they keep as pets. If a monster was small and adorable and young, a human tended to be more...sympathetic. A matter of simple "herd instinct", I imagine." Dr. Gaster said as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Young life tends to make humans go all...cuddly." He remarked.

It was true. He'd seen it in quite a lot of the animes and cartoons that his dear friend Alphys had shown him. Whenever a baby or a puppy or a kitten or small animal was on the screen, they were always being fawned over. Had he been able to keep 1-S and 2-P from aging, maybe he could have snuck them across the barrier as hidden adorable weapons that no human would ever suspect of being a threat. After all, something so tiny and soft who could barely fit your finger in their hand would melt the heart of just about anyone. You'd NEVER hit an infant.

"And there were some humans who had an attraction to a few of the monsters that were more...human in appearance? Some monsters had very human traits, like a humanoid upper or lower body. In fact, the melusine, or "merpeople" race had charmed over quite a lot of humans."

"Mer-whuh?" 1-S wanted to know. "Who're they?"

"They look rather much like fishy people. Sailors had often told of the majesty of the mermaids, and it wasn't uncommon at all to see people tilting their heads to watch these fine specimens walking down the road." Gaster chuckled as he took off his glasses, cleaning them with a napkin from his pocket. "Their hair would be a beautiful crimson or scarlet, so many shades of red, with scales that had such a fascinating blend of blue. The way the sun would gleam off their scaly bodies was a thing of beauty indeed. An exotic beauty that would entrance many a human. Sometimes they even fell in love. That's where the legend of "The Little Mermaid" came from. I used to love reading that story." He added, trailing off.

Oh yes, he used to love reading it. The mermaid had given up so much to be with the human, and for a while, the human prince had loved her too. And it had seemed, at first, that they WOULD be together. Yes, getting there had hurt the mermaid greatly. Hurt the monster greatly. But they were in love, and happy...

And then that had changed when the prince had married the human princess instead, believing the princess, not the mermaid, had saved his life those years ago.

Back then, he'd tried to take some comfort in the knowledge that the little mermaid, though she had died, had gained an immortal soul, and had become a beautiful spirit who'd one day rise up into the "Kingdom of God". That at least she'd not turned to nothing but seafoam, and had gotten a chance at an even greater happiness. Yet looking back at it...he felt angry that she'd STILL, after all she'd endured, have to do good deeds for humans for 3 centuries.

Hadn't she suffered _enough?_

"Did you ever meet any...nice humans?" 2-P asked. "Were there any where you lived?"

Gaster then flinched a bit, and 1-S could tell from the look on his face that yes. Yes, he HAD met nice humans. But even that hadn't been good.

"...I remember one in particular." Gaster finally said.

He'd been racing down the street, carrying several library books, intent on returning them. He didn't want to get in trouble, after all. He'd had on his usual overlong, grey and dark grey sweater, the adorable red scarf, the big glasses, too huge for his face. Panting heavily, he'd been tearing down the cobblestone road of the town, sandal-clad feet somewhat slipping about. "OOOF! C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!" He murmured, the books bouncing about in his arms. He had to get there in 9 minutes or it'd be closed and he'd have to pay a fine!

The sunlight was piercing through patches of clouds above, the humans in this section of town giving him the occasional look. Some found him a little cute, no doubt, since he was a "baby bones", a child skelly. Others found it unsettling, freakish, muttering the curse "_revenant_" under their breath, for they, like many, believed that skeleton monsters came from dead humans. An idea that did have **some** merit, for the only other way for skeleton monsters to be made came from cutting out pieces of their own body to create more, and since normal monsters didn't HAVE skeletons, well...where **had** the first skeleton monsters arisen from? And others still just...didn't care. They had their own troubles and were busy with other things clouding their mind like the skies above were clouding up.

And that was when he rounded the corner, just a few dozen feet from the library...and smacked headlong into a human.

"OUCH!" They collapsed onto the sidewalk below, people nearby stopping. Some looked concerned for both, others only worried about the human, a few particularly unpleasant people sniggering as the human girl Gaster had ran into moaned. "Heyyy!" She said, adjusting the thick glasses that she wore. "Watch where you're going!" She told him in an aggravated voice, Gaster blushing nervously, their books all sprayed out around them. "You made me drop my library books!"

"S-Sorry, sorry!" Gaster apologized as he began scrambling to pick them all up so he could give hers back and pluck his own up. Best to take care of hers first...he didn't want people to think he was inconsiderate. "H-Here, I'll...I'll pick them up for you!"

"Can't you be more careful, I mean...really..." The human girl muttered. She was wearing a shirt that was purplish in color, with scraggly pants. Based on her slightly holey shoes, the somewhat cloudy glasses, and the frizzled, rather spiky mess of brown hair she had atop her head, she wasn't very well-to-do. She pushed the glasses up a bit on her somewhat sharp nose, her thick eyebrows raised a little as she reached down to pluck up one of her own books.

And as she did so, her hand touched his as he reached for the same.

Absolute silence reigned. Gaster nervously gulped, for he realized she was now slightly gripping his bony hand, and she was staring right into his eyes. Eyes so very teal in color, so...soft. Her mouth was slightly agape, people murmuring and whispering as Gaster stared back, confused by the expression on her face.

"What is it?" He asked. "Your, um...your hand is...on mine...could you-" He began to say.

"Your _HAND_." She whispered out.

"Yes?"

"It's...fuzzy. It's so...soft." She murmured, looking down at it, lifting it up, feeling over it with her own hands, her eyes getting wider. "Like...it's like the hair on a comfrey leaf." She muttered out. "I thought it would be hard and bony but...its so fuzzy. It's...nice."

She held his hand, looking at it for a long time, then at him. He stared back into her, and as she held it there, the other humans looking at each other, confused, a bit surprised, Gaster thought he saw the girl crying, and trying to hold it back in her eyes. She let his hand go, picking up the last of her books and quickly walked away, leaving Gaster's books in a small pile right in front of him.

He would never see her again, but he would remember how she'd held his hand. How she'd felt over the soft texture of his bones. How surprised she'd been to feel it, and he remembered how...oddly warm and soft human hands could be.

Hands.

...why had she **cared** so much that his hands were so...soft?

He just didn't understand humans sometimes.

"Humans are just...strange." He finally said. "Years of study and even I barely know anything. And honestly, sometimes...I don't think THEY know anything about themselves."

With that, he left them alone, heading back to his office, putting his hands in the pockets of his white labcoat, softly feeling over the textures of his own palm...

And the tiny, tiny little hairs they had.


End file.
